The weeks have been flying by. Sometimes so fast, that I don't even have time to take a breath and process what has been and is happening! Yesterday, I felt myself getting to the point of almost despair with all of the things that are weighing on my mind and my heart. I got off work early and picked Kevin up to ride along to a few sales.
It was like a mini therapy session! I didn't find anything to buy, I don't even remember what I looked at to tell you the truth. I do know that I was able to pour out my heart and my hurts and my frustration and I felt a million times better when we got home.
Did anything get solved or resolved? No, but I did gain a better perspective on what's going on around me and how to keep dealing with what life throws at me without letting it swallow me up! I had all of the tools to work through the junk, I just needed to say things out loud and bounce them off someone who knows me and knows what's been going on.
I've been reading different snippets of scripture everyday for the past couple of months that seem to have just appeared at that particular moment-just for me. Have you ever had that happen? It's pretty awesome to know that a book written so long ago is still alive and active and useful to us in today's culture! Pretty awesome that the words came to me just when I needed them, and it was speaking to what I've been experiencing!
While we were driving around we started saying out loud all of the things that have gone on in our lives in less than two years-whew! It's been a doozy of a couple of years!!! We almost lost our marriage. We almost lost our home, we lost my grandma, my aunt, my grandpa and my uncle, some pretty big changes at work, my mom's macular degeneration has gotten worse, we've been to Florida and back twice (not vacations) and a bunch of small stuff going on in between all the big stuff-you know...life--- all within just about 2 years. One of those things alone would have been hard to deal with, but add all of them in together and my head is spinning and my heart sometimes felt like it was going to burst!
My heart has also been very heavy for my family and friends! So many friends and family members are losing their parents, dealing with grim diagnoses, having financial difficulties, family heartbreak, marriages tearing apart, parents children or grand children battling serious health issues-the list can go on and on and each one seems to have lodged in my heart and in my mind. When I pray for these dear family members, friends and their families, my heart aches for them and what they are going through!
Why am I even rambling? I don't know...maybe someone will read this who is going through some of the same things I've been going through will be encouraged to see that even though you are going through tough times, you can cling to the promise that God will NEVER leave you, or foresake you-no matter how hard it gets-He will be right there walking through it with you (or even carrying you!).
I know from experience.
So, if you've got something big or little that you are going through, keep reading your Bible, keep trusting God, keep believing for miracles and know that even when you are in the pit of despair-you are never alone! Maybe even take a minute to re-read the 23rd Psalm, and find a friend who is a good listener, that you can trust with your junk, and let them help you process it. Prayer is also a very big key to getting through whatever you are going through. Not just prayer, but time to be still, and listen for the still small voice of God speaking to your heart.
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